Goals

It’s important to have goals. I have a few, but not as many as you might think to meet me, given that I appear to be very driven and whatnot. Really, I’m a bit of a bullet train in that way: oh, I’m moving forward quickly and with clear direction. But really that direction is clear because I’m just following the track in front of me. Occasionally the track will split, and I’ll make a choice (usually rather quickly and with all consideration coming in the form of post hoc justification of the decision already made). God save me when I really do need to think about something in advance – there’s almost no chance of me choosing anything at all; rather, I’ll let time make my choice for me, generally in the form of not doing Whatever I’m Considering. Once a commitment is made though, my follow through is solid.

Example: Travel. If I spend any time at all really weighing the literal world of options before me, I’m not even going to take a long weekend, let alone traverse the globe. But if I log onto Hotwire and buy the first $500 ticket to anywhere interesting, I will sure as Sunday set myself up with a well-planned itinerary. I just need to front-load the commitment end of any bargain in order to follow through.

I’m very hard working for a lazy person. Or the opposite. One of those for sure.

Given this trait, I have few actionable goals in this life. I want to pay off my mortgage by my 36th birthday. I want to be able to lift myself into a handstand without kicking. I want transform my ancient but functional entertainment bouillabaisse into something sleek and representative of this century. … Yeah, that’s more or less it.

Oh and one other thing – I want to go to dinner at the Poehler/Arnett home. I want to be served hors d’oeuvre by Will Arnett and dessert by Amy Poehler. Dinner can be family style – I’m not fancy, and I’d like us all to enjoy the meal with a casual conviviality. My hosts will be so gracious that when the final course is served, I will not even ask if the tiny cookies that accompany our coffee are gluten-free. I will eat them with a grace to match theirs and deal with the consequences when I get home. Over the course of dinner, I will so delight them with my witty word-play that I’m almost certain to end up writing for one or both of them at least part time.

So there you have it: what some would term a “life goal.” Or perhaps a “pipe dream.” Or maybe even “stupid and ridiculous.” But it’s a goal nonetheless, and my own. And once I polish off that mortgage and square away the entertainment center, I will definitely give it the focus and determination it deserves. Or at the very least, I’ll watch Parks and Recreation and Up All Night online in comfort in a home I own.